Makin Money Magizine Exclusive Interview with Frank N. Beans III, Ultimate Businessman

Entertainment Correspondent - KA Versace

Making Money Magazine had the pleasure of sitting down with its Founder and CEO Mr. Frank N. Beans III this week during his annual Cash for Drugs Foundation Benefit.  He was very gracious to grant this reporter a very exclusive interview.  Here is just a sample of what he had to say that night.

MMM - Mr. Beans you are such the Ultimate Businessman. Can you give us a little insight into how you got your start?

FBIII - Well, I was born this way. I've had to fend for myself ever since I was forcefully evicted from my mother's womb. I guess you can say I was born for business.

MMM - It must have been hard for you having to fend for yourself at such an early age.  How did you manage?

FBIII - I always think about the Big Picture. As a toddler, I'd see all these kids playing in a sandbox. They were having fun and I thought to myself, "How can I make money off this?". Several days later, that sandbox mysteriously disappeared.  The neighborhood children were very upset.  I had a very special sandbox that belonged to my neighbor's cat.  Every afternoon I would borrow the sandbox from my neighbor's yard and charge the kids on the block $1 to play for 10 minutes.

MMM - Starting out from such an early age, who would you say were some of your earlier influences?

FBIII - Me. Nobody has a better head for business than I do. I could sell you your own shoes back at twice the price. I can sell an icebox to an Eskimo. I can sell a fudge Popsicle to a lady in white gloves. I can sell a steak to a Vegan. It's a gift that I have. Even as a child, I was a smarter businessman than most adults. By the time I was five, I was already running three businesses.

MMM - Well you are quite an entrepreneur, Mr. Bean.  You mentioned before one of your earlier businesses, could you possibly share a few more with our readers?

FBIII- First, the afore mentioned was Frank's SandBox Inc. was a huge success.  Then, I noticed that a couple of kids had started a lemonade stand funded by their Daddy's money...I didn't have a Daddy to fund my business, which was fine by me, because he’d probably want a percentage anyway.  I went into business for myself.  Mysteriously, the Lemonade Stand on the corner caught fire and burned to the ground, killing the two little jerks trapped inside.  Lucky for me.
The very next, day, I opened my own Lemonade Stand.  But there was a problem… I know that if I had to spend money for lemons, sugar or any of that crap it would cut into my profit.  That would be unacceptable.  I found a very easy solution to this dilemma; I mixed pee into the water.  100% profit!  And by using the pretty little girl next to sell my pee, I made money hand over fist.  Of course, I told her that I would pay her minimum wage and she would get medical benefits and paid vacation...  But she never got any of that stuff.  Basically, I got her to work for nothing.  Cha-Ching!

My third business was operating a Kissing Booth.  After I saw how much money I made from selling piss, I wondered how much more I could make from selling a kiss. I recruited several of the neighborhood girls to work for me. And I kept 90% of the earnings.

MMM - How old were you during this time Mr. Beans?

FMIII - I was Three Years Old when I become President and CEO of Beans Enterprises.  And all the businesses I mentioned, I ran all them before I started the First Grade.  But it was going to school opened up a whole new world of opportunities for me.

MMM - Being so successful at such an early age, running so many businesses did you ever have time for a little romance?

FBIII - Yeah, with my own true love...MONEY!

It seems that Mr. Beans' romance with money is still as strong today as it was all those years ago.  Some love affairs last a lifetime.  For more of this exclusive interview pick up your issue today!

Frank N. Beans - 2012 Funds for Drugs Foundation (7- 20-2012)

Often, I will attempt to use this Blog page in order to make a sale.  Being that I'm n  the process of being divorced and have to pay Child Support (Those ingrates should support me, I gave birth to them!!!)  

Anyway, when you see special offers and sales as the example above, if I were you, I buy this object as quickly as possible!  After all, this most likely means that I'm in desperate need of drug money!

I just Collected on your time...

FRANK’S DATING SERVICE

Get Connecting While I’m Collecting!

Lonely? Horny? Looking for Love, or maybe just a Meal Ticket?  Of course you are!  Take it from me, suckling at the financial teat of a partner or spouse is most certainly preferable to having to actually find a job and work for a living.   Work, who wants to do that when you can Sit Back and Collect on the heart?  There are a lot of losers out there, but there’s good news:  There’s someone for everyone!  And I can help you find the love of your live… for the right price.

Years of Marketing and Research conducted by the Beans Institute of Ultimate Business have shown an upward trend of undesirable men and women around the nation and across the globe. The modern Dating Market is ripe with Fattys, Uglies and Dummies… all of which are as desperate as you.  Some of them are wealthy, have Savings Accounts or Platinum Cards, but even those who don’t fit into the Rich category are so desperate to be loved (or at least a reasonable facsimile thereof) they’ll do almost anything… including working two or three full-time jobs!!!  They’ll support you; buy you nice things!  They’ll happily suffer through verbal abuse and mental manipulation.   They will even tolerate your nasty drug habits and occasional physical confrontation.  Put my decades of Ultimate Business experience to work for you.

Sure she’s Hideous to look at, but with her Rent-Free couch at your disposal, you’ll be able to sleep most days away in luxury and you won't have to look at her much!

Yes, he’s Morbidly Obese, however, that just means he is about ready to have a fatal heart attack.  Make sure your name is incorporated into his will before it’s too late!!!   **


Frank's Dating Service is easier than collecting a monthly welfare check!  I guarantee I can set you up on a date with a desperate man, woman or man-woman...so be sure to wear your best T shirt and leave your wallet at home!


There is a one time $300 Registration fee to set up and begin your on-line account with us.  A $69.99 monthly fee will be billed weekly for your account for continuing service.  Taxes and applicable fees and surcharges  apply.


My staff is on call twenty-four hours a day to satisfy your Dating Service needs and answer questions or update your profile for a nominal fee.


Call now before all the rich ones are taken!!!


""NOTE By using this Dating Service, you hereby agree that Frank N, Beans III is entitled to at least 75% of all inheritance money and assets bequeathed to you or your estate in the event of a death of  Dating Service partner. 

GREATNESS IS BORN

This is one of my very first baby pictures, taken when I was 1 Year Old.  Ah, memories....

DISCLAIMERS:

MAKIN' MONEY is a work of comedic fiction.  Frank N. Beans III is a fictional character and similarities to persons living or dead is purely coincidental... no matter how much of a scumbag you claim to be.

FRANK N. BEANS III, The Ultimate Businessman, MAKIN' MONEY and DARK ODDITY are property of CORE FILMS, INC.  Copyright 2007.

MY NEW BOOK "EVERYTHING IS A GHOST"

CHAPTER 1

My name is Frank. I am the ultimate psychic. EVer since I was an infant I used to perform Spirit Rescue from my crib. I see ghosts everywhere. They talk to me and only me because I am the man. All other psychics are fakes and frauds.

Have you ever heard a noise from nowhere? Have you ever seen a shadow out of the corner of your eye? Do you know what that is? It's a spooky ghost! You probably asking yourself, "Frank, Frank, What is a ghost?" Not to get all scientifical, but try to follow -- a ghost is the ghost of a dead person who has died. Some ghosts are scary. Some ghosts are not so scary. Some ghosts are noisy. Some ghost are quiet. They make houses haunted. Haunted houses are very, very spooky and scary.

For more please purchase chapter 2.